Ahhh yes, we know them, they live amongst us, sometimes we are even that person for other people! We need to recognise them, ignore them, often still love them, but most of all just carry on with our day, because we know above all else that we are doing the right thing...... for ourselves, our future selves and our families.
YOUR SUCCESS MAKES THEM DOUBT THEMSELVES
People like to be right. We like to FEEL right. It's human nature. As you become fitter, look fitter, say no to that McDonald's at lunchtime, have a water instead of a pint after work, you make other people feel self-conscious of their decision. "Ah but it's no fun drinking alone, just have one pint". They don't want you to be different, it makes them feel uncomfortable. Well do you know what, tough shit. You are trying to become healthier and happier. Who the feck are they to get in the way! Now this doesn't mean we don't still love them, however I'll be buggered if I'm letting someone else choose my destiny. That's on me.
THEY'RE NOT READY TO MAKE A CHANGE
That's cool right? We're not all at the same place at the same time, that's what make life interesting. And we'll already be there to support them if they ever do decide they want to embark on a fitness journey. But we're not gonna wait for them... we're going to start our own journey when we are ready. It's like women that only go to the bathroom in twos.... what, you're gonna wet yourself because your mate doesn't need a wee yet? Nah, I'm good, I'll just go on me own thanks!
THEY JUDGE YOU ON THEIR PERSONAL PREFERENCE
'Ah well done! You've lost some weight, just don't get too thin now' or my personal favourite 'Ooooo look at your arms, is that it now? Because you don't want to get too muscley do you?'
Now we all need that friend we trust who's going to let us know when we look like we've spent 6 months doing crack in a derelict building HOWEVER almost everyone else (and I mean everyone) will have a comment to make. I have literally two friends who have never ever done this. They are probably the 2 most self assured people I know and are 100% not interested in counting macros, one of them feels proud if she eats a pea and the other one passes me a water while she cracks open a litre of wine. They do not feel threatened by my change, they don't feel the need to instil their opinion on me to make themselves feel comfortable. They just ARE comfortable and they know what I like so hold their own personal views inside their head and support me.
The thing to remember is everyone is different. And everyone reaches a different point in their life at different times. Many of our fitness saboteurs are people we love. A lot. And that is NOT going to change because they make a comment that makes you want to drown them in your almond milk. It's cool, just be confident that you know where you are at, you know you are doing the right thing. At some point these very same people will be asking you for your advice or your support as they start their own journey. And you of course will give it and support them on their OWN journey and not just a replication of yours. There is not just one pathway to a happier, healthier and more confident lifestyle and everyone should be allowed to make their own.
This is the thing I LOVE about the fitness industry. Everyone celebrates other people's achievements... we like weight loss photos on Insta, people's stories of getting fit in the face of adversity, before and after's of a bodybuilder. Change is celebrated. And too bloody right. We've worked hard for this shit so why shouldn't we be proud of where we have got to wherever that may be, you included.
So my final words are, enjoy yourself, be confident that you're doing the right thing, ignore the saboteurs (whilst giving them a cuddle, they just make us more determined anyway) and don't be smug when they come to you for advice in 6 months. It's much easier to be supportive when you don't feel threatened.